i am found
within this reverie
joyed at
how
so tenderly
you
have opened my words
nicoLe is breathing. 4/11/2001 12:27:23 PM

---

a measure of conscience
dangling from her the corner of her mouth
like a sunrise cigarette

keeps her mumbling
nicoLe is breathing. 3/22/2001 10:36:04 AM

---

[pendulum]

can't stop the perpetual
back and forth swinging,
the undersung tickticktock
of simple words shared and
stolen & opening
until-now-unseen
doorways and crevices
revealing gossamer bondage
and sudden reciprocation--

but who am i to ignore the
nod of a passing stranger?

(for random @ lonelybookshelf.org)
nicoLe is breathing. 3/7/2001 01:36:23 PM

---

[whitenoise]

everything is silent,
paused & muted under
the storm / every
quiet eye focused
on Chaos dancing:
Her unpredictable rhythms
so very known and distant,
Her bare ivory skin
pressing itself against
our terrified awe. and
Her soft white depth
weighing down on us,

leaving us trembling
in Her wake, trying
to recover our bent,
aching branches.

nicoLe is breathing. 2/6/2001 02:58:01 PM

---

we were juniper drunk--
lovers and pirates
crossing between
days and walls and ourselves

nicoLe is breathing. 10/20/2000 06:21:35 PM

---

winter love--

  you are
frail grey afternoons
   of cold fingers
   & eternity eyes

delicious
     soft  and        groping
nicoLe is breathing. 10/19/2000 03:46:19 PM

---

[punk lolita]

you are blue wounds tight
against pages, like black
leather & safety pins,
like fishnet stockings
stretching up thighs--
               words
with revealing holes.

(for sarah)
nicoLe is breathing. 10/10/2000 05:38:40 PM

---

[iris alive in the suburban ghetto] (v1.0)

she's spilled her pitcher
& the streets are gushing
brilliance: blue stretching open sky;
red shouting letters above the wine &
spirits shop; yellow arching against
curbs; green peeling from signposts.
nicoLe is breathing. 9/20/2000 06:07:51 PM

---

[zero visibility]

hope hangs low around us
like thick and glittering fog.
blinded, we sing victory songs
as if fate were on our side.
nicoLe is breathing. 9/20/2000 05:49:59 PM

---

[empathy]
(for ric)

i hear you lost yourself today.
not in that exhilerating inhibitionless way,
but in that quietly misplaced your keys way.
stuffing your hands between couch cushions,
behind the refigerator, under the bed, and
wiggling your fingers, you hoped you might
grab onto some piece of the intangible you.
i saw you, eyes-poked-out and hollow, and
curled my mouth into soundless sincerity,
which if you could still see had you not
lost your eyes on inward search, you
would recognize as my simply saying:
me too.
nicoLe is breathing. 8/21/2000 03:43:08 PM

---

you spend lifetimes waking
changing so softly
only the stars see
nicoLe is breathing. 8/2/2000 05:08:06 PM

---

your hands are orchids
blossoming against my skin
such fragility
nicoLe is breathing. 8/1/2000 03:22:53 PM

---

sunset gestured
like tangerine laughter
smiling sweet crimsoned petals
hoping to salvage
the bruising skinless sky
nicoLe is breathing. 8/1/2000 03:10:23 PM

---

[raspberries and vinegar]

i've seen you cracked
open, held in my spread fingers
your dripping insides, let you
fall among my folds. each day
i lick my thumbs, constantly
hungry for your sweet vinaigrette.

(another poem for
ric's guestbook.)
nicoLe is breathing. 7/31/2000 01:23:21 PM

---

[i can't get used to sharing my bed.]

i can't get used to
the feeling of your body
next to mine, all heat
and moisture. the
clinging limbs and
restricted movement.

this is a sign of permanence:
you hold me down as i try
to breathe in syncopation,
try to avoid your discarded CO₂.
this is what scares me.

i can't get used to
your breath and hands
falling all over me.
the way you wake up
as i am trying to
find sleep, and kiss me,
squeeze me, make sure i
love you, want to be
right here with you.

this is a sign of permanence:
in the morning, i wake up
to you watching me sleep.
you are on your side, propped
up on one elbow, smiling just
subtly, joy in your eyes.
this is why i keep trying.

08jan00
nicoLe is breathing. 7/21/2000 04:36:57 PM

---

[love song 01]
(ritardando)

this breaking sadness
does not leave me. it
pulses silently under
my skin, ripping at my insides
when i smile. it does not know
compassion. it does not care
about broken arteries& emptied
voices. this sorrow is mine.

28jan00
nicoLe is breathing. 7/21/2000 04:33:07 PM

---

[homeostasis lost]

i was just reading about decline
of amphibians. it was suggested
that their dropping populations
are a result of industrialization
or increased ultraviolet light or
new predators, but i think maybe
they are like us, losing balance
between the clever cool of water
beds and necessity's dry heat.

04.14.00
nicoLe is breathing. 7/21/2000 04:28:39 PM

---

[read me/read meat]

you tear me up,
leave bits of me
to be ground into the carpet,
kicked under the bed,
picked up by your mother
who gasps at my obscenity--
a foot here, a cunt there--
and throws me away,
then washes her hands,
serves up sirloin for dinner.

(a poem deposited in a friend's guestbook.)
nicoLe is breathing. 7/12/2000 05:35:00 PM

---

[lost time found]

opaque echoes of youth
dissipating with
the racing fade of
liquored vigilance
nicoLe is breathing. 7/5/2000 02:04:09 PM

---

[need v. want]
(need wins every time)

your kiss is like lemonade
in mid-august swelter--
needed and welcome, but
so sour on the way down.
nicoLe is breathing. 6/30/2000 04:31:22 PM

---

[sweet naïveté]

she speaks
with dreamfumbled lips
that don't know
how to say no
or why they might ever need to.
nicoLe is breathing. 6/30/2000 04:16:44 PM

---

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